10 green flags that make someone a great mate
hello • 23 November 2020
“A great mate can tell when something is off and will reach out and ask if everything is going OK. Even when things are good, it’s nice knowing someone is looking out for you.”
Good friends are invaluable. They’re there with us to share best moments of life and they’re there for us when times are tough, offering a shoulder to lean on and a listening ear.
When discussing friendships, we often hear about the red flags – the warning signs – that someone might not be the right fit for us. To turn this concept on its head, a Reddit user recently posed a question about the green flags – the good qualities – that make someone a great mate.
This inspired us to ask our online community to share their green flags so we can celebrate, acknowledge and inspire everyone to be the kind of friend who’s there through all of life’s ups and downs.
What makes someone a great mate?
- “A great mate is honest with you. They’ll check up on you, have your back and be there even before you realise you need them.”
- “Random acts of kindness - particularly to those who may seem out of sorts.”
- “They make regular contact. Even just a text to say ‘hi’ or to share a cheerful photo. A reminder you're thought of can brighten a day.”
- “Someone who will just sit with you and be a shoulder to lean on when you don’t have the energy to speak.”
- “Honesty, loyalty and somebody who loves and accepts you for the person you are. Somebody you can fully be yourself with and can open up to and discuss anything and everything. That person who is there for you always, even in your worst times - not just for the fun days.”
- “A great mate can tell when something is off and will reach out and ask if everything is going OK. Even when things are good, it’s nice knowing someone is looking out for you.”
- “Someone who remembers small, but important facts, like a favourite candy bar or interest. While it is a small thing, these facts can be validating and show that someone really listens and cares.”
- “A great mate doesn't turn away at your darkest moment. They join you to remind you that you will get well, and the light will shine again.”
- “Someone who keeps their word and checks up on you when they know you're going through a hard time. Someone who supports you through the good and bad times.”
- “A good friend will help steer you in the right direction without judgement.”
All of these qualities can help make someone a great mate, so it’s important we celebrate the people in our lives who have them, and it’s important that we all try to embody them. There are many more good qualities that aren’t on this list, and they should be celebrated too, so reach out to someone who’s flown the green flag for you and say thanks.
Find conversation tips and resources to help you support someone in your world who may be struggling at www.ruok.org.au/how-to-ask
If you or someone you know needs immediate support, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or access one of the services listed at www.ruok.org.au/findhelp
R U OK? ambassadors have shared their stories and the importance of asking R U OK? Any Day.
After losing their friend Jade, a group of friends formed the Sunflower Sisters to honour her memory. Running the City2Surf, they raised awareness about mental health and the power of checking in.
Don’t wait for R U OK?Day to bring the message to your classroom. Use these ten ideas to build an R U OK? Culture in your school community.
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